Pizza Hut Will Give You Free Pizza For Life . . . If You Ask the Presidential Candidates About Pizza On Live TV:

 

 

Next Tuesday, PRESIDENT OBAMA and MITT ROMNEY are doing a town hall-style debate at Hofstra University in New York, where people in the crowd can ask them questions.

 

 

And it just got interesting.  Not because of what they'll say . . . but because of how YOU can selfishly commandeer the entire thing for your own GLUTTONY.

 

 

Pizza Hut is offering FREE PIZZA FOR LIFE if you can get into the town hall, get on the mic to ask the candidates a question, and make that question:  "Do you prefer sausage or pepperoni on your pizza?"

 

 

Pizza Hut says they're not THAT worried about turning the presidential debate into a publicity stunt or a farce.

 

 

Quote, "We recognize there are a lot of serious issues to be debated, but we also know a lot less serious, but no less important, ones are being discussed every night inside houses across the country." 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Police Catch a Bank Robber When He Uses Dye-Stained Bills at a Strip Club:

 

 

Last Wednesday afternoon, 37-year-old Todd J. Kettler of Rochester, Michigan robbed a Charter One Bank.  And he might've gotten away with it . . . if he could've resisted the urge to have NAKED BREASTS IN HIS FACE.

 

 

Because the bank was able to slip a red dye pack in with his stolen money . . . and it EXPLODED.  But Todd tried to use the money anyway. 

 

 

On Sunday, he hit the Angels Gentlemen's Club in Kalamazoo, Michigan, and used the money he'd stolen to pay for some lap dances.

 

 

Since the money was STAINED, some strippers showed their manager the dyed cash, and he called the cops.

 

 

They linked Todd to the bank robbery and arrested him.  He's facing charges of armed robbery, bank robbery, and firearms possession. 

 

 

(MLive) 

 

 

 

 

 

Police are Searching For a Man Who Robbed a Sex Store at Knifepoint Just To Get a Penis Pump:

 

 

I understand not wanting to buy a penis pump with a credit card.  You don't necessarily want your name connected to that.  But just pay cash.  There's no need to do THIS.

 

 

Around 4:45 A.M. on Sunday, a man busted into an adult store called Zone d'Erotica in Forest Lane, Texas.  He had a knife, and he demanded two things:  Some cash . . . and a nice penis pump.

 

 

The clerk gave him $250 from the register.  The thief selected his own penis pump, which was worth about $150.

 

 

The cops are still looking for him.